By: Chinwe Ifitezue, Institute of Archaeology, Jos
Marriage is an important socio-cultural institution recognized, accepted and respected by every responsible mature citizen in the society. It is the root and center for family formation. The union has a legal backing for purposes of procreation and companionship in order to live peacefully among themselves and the society. The universality in it is that every responsible and mature adult honours it and strife for it. Aside from man’s recognition towards marriage, God honours marriage very much for it is His institution for procreation/companionship, continuity/consistency for the existence of man and earth alike.
Culture on the other hand, is people’s way of life and uniquely accepted by them whether written or not which include life, norms, values, traditions, etc.
Based on the above, a bride in Igbo culture is a blessing to all the community because everyone is involved in the marriage, adult men/women, boys/girls all inclusive, not only the immediate family though it’s the pride of the immediate family. For the celebration, the occasion usually takes place in the family place except otherwise.
Girls marriage in Igbo land especially in Ifite community in Njikoka LGA of Anambra state, marriage in the olden days there was an honour to the bride’s family, and the entire community and the groom’s family also and his entire community. It was used as bedrock for solidifying kinship system because traditional marriage ceremony was not for the bride alone but for everybody in the community of the bride. The bride/groom and their families may invite people but on the part of the bride, everybody in the community is invited. A daughter in the clan of the community is known generally as Adaayi, meaning our daughter, Ada Orah meaning, the daughter of all, Ada Obi meaning daughter of the clan or land. This is shown when a girl is born, is for everybody and as she is getting married everybody is also invited in her immediate environment.
In the light of this when a girl does not marry within the expected age of marriage it becomes the concern of all, families get worried, comes together to find out the reason for over staying in the father’s house, some of the communities also get concerned and meet with the parents. The bride price of a girl in Igbo land is shared amongst the kinsmen, no matter how small it is and they feel delighted in partaking anyone left out will take it up to know why he is excluded because she’s their daughter not only of the parents. This is why a daughter in Igbo land is adored by her people, whenever she’s seen, she’s greeted in a special way depending on the greetings of that land to their daughters but it must be special.
Although marriage is universal, it varies from one locality, community, state, country, religion and the rest, depending on beliefs, function, religious, type, culture and so on. However, change and continuity as said, can never grow or fall a belief or culture. This is the case here some people do not attend traditional marriage ceremony unless they are invited for reason or the other, e.g. ego/title.
Also, parents are not allowed mostly to involve in their children’s marriage which is one of their pride before. Sons just bring home wives for their parents, likewise the daughters either after living together for some time or after wedding or others thereby denying the community the chances, pride, joy and ego they derive while marrying out their daughter honourably.
However, the changes that might have been adopted or enforced, the community in Igbo land will never accept any kind of marriage to their culture or traditions like the gay marriage. It’s highly an abomination in Igbo land. The community is fighting seriously to maintain their marriage values and retain its honour. These shows why Igbo daughters return home for their traditional wedding, other functions can take place anywhere. During the traditional weddings, the women gather to give words of advice and instructions on how to live and behave in her husband’s house in order not to bring shame to the family.
In conclusion, I believe and know that their honour and regard towards a girl child in Igbo land traditional marriage will not be allowed to die totally, or undergo more changes than it has gone because it checkmates the life of a girl child in Igbo land to be married honourably. This is so because it minimizes divorce in the society as both families are involved, it will also reduce rate of unwanted pregnancy.
I hope also that this article will re-awaken the regards and respect of girl child not just in Ifite community in Njikoka Local Government Area of Anambra State but the entire Igbo community.
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