LITTLE THINGS THAT MATTER

By Nnabugwu Chizoba

 This picture has nothing to do with the family in this story

What you are about to read, is the story of the NWANKWO’s. For your information, “Nwankwo” means a boy born on Nkwo market day. Please note that this explanation has no relevance with the story you’re about to read.

If there is anything like an exemplary couple, the NWANKWO’s is one. From the easily noticeable humble carriage of the Man, to the admirable calm disposition of the Wife, people say they are a perfect blend.

According to the neighbours who were quick to discuss in details about the NWANKWO’s, because of what they consistently referred to as passionate and cordial relationship of the couple with all, said they are people of enticing personality, love, inspiration, understanding and candor.

The story is not only interesting but habours meaningful lessons, milestones and food for thought, especially for today’s parents and would be ones.

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While a segment of the society may consider the events that preceded their coming together as husband and wife, coincidental, others may see them as designed. Whichever of the schools of thought that you belong to, the most important thing is that the story has something of value for you.

The Man, a little boy then lived with the Grandma, having been brought home by the Parents to get acquainted with the culture and tradition of his people. In view of this, he was left at home to do his secondary education, while he lived with the grandma.

Within the same time, there was this little girl, from a nearby village, but who lived with the elder sister, who was married to a Man from the village where the little boy was staying with the grandma. The girl was regarded in the community as very stubborn, quick tempered and always fighting. Her life style was a huge contrast with her elder sister, who was very respectful, humane and cool tempered. Don’t forget she was a little girl. We all have them and know their likes too.

Any Man or Woman, that ever relocated from the city to the village as a little boy or girl will confirm this. You are always the target of harassment, abuse, neglect, picketing and as a matter of fact, a regular guest to one form of fight or the other.

Any attempt whatsoever, by you to avoid such, was akin to and treated as self-condemnation, indeed an invitation for constant humiliation, denials and maltreatments, so long as the village urchins were concerned. May be such a thing still happens till date, I don’t know.

If you are not prepared to engage them head long. The only thing that has the capacity to stop them, of course, was your parents being invited to pick you back to the city. Those that saw the fights as very good omen were the ones who survived the barrage of attacks. They were very much integrated into the fold, mostly as champions and untouchables.

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The story of the little boy was not different. Every now and then, the village boys, as they were often but derogatorily referred to, continually confronted him with various forms of shenanigan disposition. At every occasion that they created they freely and openly demonstrated their hunger and huge appetite for a fight.

One by one he settled almost all, with his own dosage of the fight. At a point whenever they craved for it, they got it more urgently than they expected or ever imagined. In all the fights registered against him, he had the upper hand, yet remained level headed, but untouchable. This was the position of things, at a time, at least with his fellow boys, but not with the stubborn girl, whom he avoided like a plague.

His heroic exploits and intimidating record with the boys notwithstanding, the stubborn girl was always fermenting trouble and constantly challenging him for a fight. No matter the degree of provocation, he always avoided her. But, a day came that he could no longer stomach it.

That day, he gave the girl the biting of her life, of which he was supported by the community, except the grandma, who never took it kindly, with him. She gave him (the grandson) the scolding of his life.

This position of grandma, was a development he could not fathom. If he was surprised, every other person in the community was devastated. No one could comprehend grandma’s position on the matter. It was a very strange development. Many, including the girls elder sister voiced their consternation against grandma’s position. Grandma did not give a damn, nor did anything to indicate a shift in her base. Those who have them, even to date, will agree that grandma’s are like that.

When tempers were down, grandma invited his grandson for a heart to heart talk as most grandmas of old will do. In a highly serene environment and with an emotionally laden tone, she warned her grandson never again to succumb to the tantrums, pressure, and anger of a woman.

Grandma, was vehement in her condemnation of him. She took exception to what she strongly considered as external influence. According to her, she observed that he acted because of what people were saying, and what they would say if he did not react to the girl, not because he could not withstand the girl’s irritations, as he had always done. She told him, by yielding to the external pressure and influence, he proved himself a weakling, a bold-less man, one that lacked self-control and unable to take a decision and stand by it. She admonished him to desist from such and never to repeat it again.

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The following day, Grandma invited the girl in question and in the course of their discussion, raised all the issues the community members accused her of and demanded a change. She cited the exemplary life style and conduct of the sister, whom all in the community, sang praises of day in day out.

Before grandma concluded, she cautioned her, never to talk to the opposite sex, the way she does. She enjoined her to always respect the opposite sex. She assured her that it was one huge option for a healthy relationship with them.

Finally, she invited the grandson and asked him to apologise to the girl, for the biting and equally requested the girl to ask him for forgiveness. Without wasting time both of them complied with grandma’s wish.

As days passed by and events rolled slowly but steadily, a bond, firmly rooted on compassion and respect began to develop, not just between the boy and the girl but for the families.

As you would rightly expect, the bond between the boy and the girl grew from strength to strength, and even stronger with each day that passed. They kept relating closely, more like brother and sister, until they completed secondary education. The boy went to the university, to study Accountancy, while the girl opted for a degree in education.

All through their university education, the words of grandma vibrated in their heads and guided their ways. This endeared them to people, and as a matter of fact attracted unprecedented level of respect and the admiration of others.

Though they did not go to the same university, nor related closely within the period, the benefits of grandma’s lesson were enduring, impactful and equally revealing. While the boy joined the parents in the Northern part of Nigeria, the girl relocated with the sister and the husband to Lagos, in the Southern part of the Country. Recall, telephone was a huge luxury then.

Dear reader, the story has just begun. Next weekend is another date. Please join us for the concluding part.

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The different Platforms that stories will be told on are:

• Little things that matters (the platform you’re on presently).
•  It doesn’t matter that matters and
• New Generation taking-over

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